Mummy’s Big Night Out: A Poem


Don’t get me wrong, you’re very cute

But make another peep

And I will lose my mind my dear

So please just go to sleep


Mummy has a date you see

With friends, with wine, with life

So please just sort your damn self out

And save me from this strife


My poor old mane still needs a wash

No clue on what to wear

So, I’ve got better things to do

Than sit and stroke your hair


Not got a scrap of make up on

It’s going to take me hours

To look alive and well again

I need some magic powers


My friends are waiting patiently

And drinking up the booze

I’d have been there years ago

If you’d just had a snooze


I don’t ask you for much, my sweet

And give you all I’ve got

But if you don’t fall asleep right now

Friends we will be not 


I don’t know why you’re crying, love

I’ve snuggled you all day

There’s not a chance on this green earth

I’ll let you up to play


I need a drink already now

The screaming’s done me in

Please husband, won’t you be a dear

And get me all the gin?


But oh you’re just a little one

You haven’t got a clue

How much you’re getting on my nerves

So here, let me tell you


You may just be a baby, love

Of this I have no doubt

But NEVER get your butt in the way

Of Mummy’s big night out.

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Lucy is a parenting blogger and freelance writer from the West Midlands. As a first time mummy, she writes about everything from poo explosions to ditching the love handles (often in poetic form!). You can find her at: Twitter: @muffintopmummy2 Facebook: @muffintopmummy Insta: @muffintopmummyblog Blog: